Can you have the perfect relationship?
The perfect relationship—where you are always joyful with your perfect partner, is similar to how you relate with a dog.
In a perfect relationship communication is key
You cannot change a dog, not into a cat, or a horse, the same way you can- not change people. It’s either you love and accept them as they are or you don’t. A dog knows how to have a perfect relationship with you. When your dog does something wrong, it doesn’t diminish his love for you at all no matter what you do about it.
A dog doesn’t expect anything from you, he just loves you. The dog takes perfect responsibility for his half of the relationship (barking at you, licking your face, tail wagging) and doesn’t try to do your part (taking care of the dog, playing with the dog), and you do your half almost perfectly, too. Relationships with dogs are easy because they don’t judge you, they don’t have any opinions, nor do they pity you. They don’t want to change you according to their expectations because they have none.
It is so easy to imagine this perfect relationship with a canine, but why not with another human?
How does one choose the right person for them? Who is the perfect man and woman for one’s self? It’s someone going the same direction, someone compatible to your morals and perceptions, whether emotionally, physically, economically, or spiritually. Most of all, the right man or woman for you is the man or woman who does not have to change for you love him or her just the way he or she is. You are the right man or woman for him or her, if you don’t have to change for your partner.
Once you meet a person, you immediately get introduced to their dream, they share information with you. You get to see what you’re buying into so if you cannot accept that person for who she or he is, why get into a relationship at all? You will end up trying to change the other person, you will open emotional wounds that will get infected by emotional poison, and you will end up throwing the poison back and forth until one of you explodes, you’ve set yourself up for failure from day one.
Before even getting into a relationship, you must know what you want. A person can love many people, but finding someone to stay by your side requires a partner who is more closely aligned to you. You are buying, and you are also selling yourself at the same time. Be honest about who you are so the right person can see it and accept it. Do not invent a different person that will eventually be discovered as a lie. This is the message.
But what if you are already in a relationship for some time? There are two choices you can make: one: to start a new beginning with your partner, by accepting him or her for who he or she really and truly is, and two: to let go, and allow your partner to find that someone who will accept him or her as he or she is, the same way you should allow yourself to find that person who will accept you for who you are.
Should you choose to stay, your new beginning should start within you: take a step back, and accept who you are first. There may have been lies and images created to fit the mold that was expected of you, free yourself from it. Once you’ve accepted yourself, only then can you start accepting your partner. Don’t try to change that person anymore, do not expect anything and do not put new conditions to replace the old ones.
If the relationship does not work for you, respect yourself and your partner and let go. Do not waster either of your time.
Once you are in your new beginning with your partner, you practice love in order to master it. Be aware of the track in which you are in, and strive to stay within the track of love.
That also means handling the bad moments that come in relationships as well.
There are those that you can overcome with support and care, such as losing a job, or an accident. There are those that also call for an evaluation of the relationship, such as those that come from fear: lack of respect, humiliation, even hatred. A relationship won’t survive long with bad moments that stem from fear. Abuse, whether emotional of physical, is also a bad moment that calls to end the relationship.
There are times when you don’t feel the same thing, as well. When you are unhappy, you shouldn’t expect your partner to be unhappy as well; you draw the support from the happiness that he or she feels and the love he or she shares with you. If you want to be left alone, your partner should allow you to be and respect that. When your partner is unhappy, you can do the same. You both take care of your half of the relationship, deal with the garbage in your half of the relationship, and heal your part of the relationship without trying to take responsibility for the other or expecting the other to take the responsibility from you.
Take a look back at the concept of the wounded mind: the emotional body is sick, riddled with emotional wounds and infected with emotional poison. Once in a relationship were you are aware of each other’s wounds, you come to an agreement to not touch them and hurt them; to let each heal their own wounds without pushing the other.
Communication is key. Be honest about your needs and trust each other. Take care of your own half’s garbag and share love, romance, and understanding. Once you are healed, you serve your love to each other, without expectations and conditions. You are there to please the one you love, and every kiss, every touch is an offering with no strings. Sex will be your communion; an expression of beauty.
Make it work. Never leave a true relationship for a few faults. Nobody is perfect, nobody is correct in the end affection is always greater than perfection. Relationships are worth fighting for, but you can’t be the only one fighting
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