How Attraction Works

One of the most persistent problems in relationships is that neither sex really “gets” the other and most men don’t look past their penis’s long enough to really understand the subtle yet profound differences in attraction between women and men.

But how could anyone expect you to? How many of us were given a set of rules and guidelines by our parents, teachers and society? How many of the rules you taught were “right” did you stop to open-mindedly consider from all possible angles?

Let’s say a woman told you she wasn’t attracted to you and wanted to just be friends. Let’s examine two types of men and how they handle this situation.

An open-minded person would think:

“Well I’m really mad and upset that she broke my heart telling me, ‘can we still be friends’ but in all fairness she can’t help the way she feels and she was compassionate and caring enough to be as nice about it as possible oh well whatever, I’m not going to worry about it I’m gonna focus on finding plenty of other opportunities.”

Where most men would just think:

“Yeah whatever, I don’t want friendship fuck that. I didn’t get what I wanted out of her and that’s all that matters who cares if she’s trying to be nice to me?”

The key difference between these two scenarios was that in one the man was thinking from the woman’s perspective and really taking the time to show her care and respect that she showed him despite being rejected.

The open-minded man also had REAL self-confidence and emotional security. He didn’t need the woman and was secure enough in himself to respect her decision instead of being bitter and angry about it because he wasn’t harboring any underlying anger, jealousy, bitterness or insecurity on his mind and was confident and truly didn’t need her.

The closed-minded man was simply being selfish and focusing on the fact that he wasn’t getting what he wanted… perhaps that could have been the reason why he wasn’t successful at keeping her attracted in the first place.

Many women will worry like hell about telling a guy they aren’t attracted to him. I’ve heard about women literally spending hours thinking about the best way to avoid hurting a man’s feelings.

Guess what happens when she finally tells the guy?

He is cold and hostile toward her and she ends up feeling bad and worrying about whether she was too rough with his feelings.

Humans tend to think they are too smart for their own good and because of this often miss out on what’s really happening around them.

Why we fail to see all these things stems from a number of reasons that include:

  • Social Programming
  • Core Beliefs
  • Closed-Mindedness
  • Inward-Focus
  • Need For Self Gain
  • Need For Self Validation


I’m sure you’ve been around enough people to not be surprised by the fact that most people simply think that they know best; that they have the puzzle solved and if everyone would just listen to them people would be much better off.

People often behave in this way as a result of self-esteem issues of one kind or another… everyone has their social programming in place and they feel hurt knowing that they’re wrong which, quite often, closes their mind off to new possibilities.

People are afraid to accept that they might be wrong and are even more scared of admitting that there is an aspect of themselves that is totally out of their control but is also perfectly natural.

These are usually also the guys who go out of their way to try to fake being caring, sensitive and compassionate and are also the guys who are in many cases afraid to say what they’re really thinking and feeling around women; afraid to be the same person around their girlfriend that they are with the guys.

Figuring Her Out

“The great question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul is, what does a woman want?” - Sigmund Freud

On the whole, women are looking for something different than men; women are built differently.

  • They talk differently.
  • They think differently.
  • They respond differently.
  • They act differently.


Think of masculinity as the yin and femininity as the yang; two sides of a whole. The masculinity is designed to compliment a woman’s femininity much in the way that physically a penis is designed to compliment the vagina.

Regardless of where we came from males and females are built to fit together like two halves of a circle.

Women respond to masculine, approachable men just like men respond to cute, feminine girls.

 Women want strong men who will stand their ground and say no when they throw temper tantrums.

Why? Because it sends emotional spikes down there body that they want to feel over and over again.

 Attractive women are different than other women and you need to realize and accept this in order to really achieve the results your looking for.

Beautiful women have been socially spoiled all their lives. Not entirely however, they get used, played, tricked and many times have trust issues as a result of being played so many times so don’t get me wrong here their lives are FAR from perfect.

Nonetheless they have the huge advantage being able to have any man they want pretty much (although many are too socially conditioned to take initiative and get the men they want).

These women, for the most part, have had men treat them like princesses since the age of 15 and are not looking for the “same old loser” who is going to worship them as something they are not instead of treating them like a regular person like anyone else.

When did the same old thing ever get your attention?

Now when did something unique catch your attention so well that you “just had to” show it to all your friends who showed it to all their friends.

A woman is like anything else.

When you first look at her from a guy’s perspective she is like a Rubik's Cube but once you understand here it becomes

“Duh…of course! How could I have missed this simple thing?”

These days we are getting a far better understanding than ever before about women and attraction in general. However most men are not taking a genuine opportunity to embrace the wealth of knowledge we have accumulated in the 21st century.

If I asked you why men think differently than women what would you tell me? Now, how would you explain it? Don’t scroll down. No cheaters here!

Really give it some thought and come up with an answer.

If you able to explain that women are run primarily by emotions and men are run primarily by logic then we are on good footing here.

 So now let’s dig a little deeper in to this so we can fill your brain with knowledge and get you going.

Have you ever noticed that we break down attraction, love and affection in to a science while women think in terms of “true love” and “soul-mates”?

One is logical and the other is emotional. Hmm I wonder if there could be a connection there? And about sex? Yep you guessed it she works differently there too. Men will jump in to bed on arousal alone. When it goes up we want to go in.

Women however will rarely if ever go to bed without an emotional connection to a man. Women are programmed to be more cautious about who they breed with as they are capable of getting pregnant.

Other articles you might like 

10 Secrets To Make Her Want You

How to Use Psychology To Attract Women

How to get a woman interested in you fast




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